i guess im taking the brunt of my insomnia now.

so many things happening at one same time. i feel that this is so uncalled for.

dislocation of my thumb, many many more. not being able to train hurts a whole lot more. how could anyone ever comprehend that?

classmates keep telling me that i needa be more positive about life, but honestly, where's the positivity and fairness in life?

i try to take things as they come, but good things are hard to find. and all i find are pain, sorrow and uncalled for emotions which were supposed to have been already buried deep within me, never awakening to the surface.

guess friends always know me as the noisy, loud and irritating boy. but do they know the reason why im always loud, noisy and irritating? no they don't. they just jump the gun and expect everything to be the way they stereotype it to be.

honestly speaking my friends, i do not want to let you guy downs, especially my dearest canoe team, my skcc buddies, and my new classmates.

but the fact is, the Aaron you guys know, is nothing more but a shell. all these things happening? i find them frustrating, and those who can see beyond the beyond of my background, i'm very sure you guys know i like things kept simple.

all this things, the source of trouble. i just wanna get away from it. bury it or something. i just dun wanna be taking the brunt of these things all the time. i wanna get stronger but not in this way! this is too much even for a guy like me who's a tanker.

P.S

i apologise to the group of W45M whom i went out with just earlier this evening. we were supposed to be happily eating, chatting and having fun. but i guess my freaking lousy attitude affected everyone else around me. i believe what Andrew said was spot on, i have the ability to affect others tremendously.

but that aside, im really sorry everyone that i was quiet throughout the whole day, suddenly bursting into flames while in class. i just wasnt myself today, and i personally believe that this is gonna continue. i dun want it to, but like i said, the Aaron you guys knew was nothing than a shell.

i dun wanna be this way, but for now, staying quiet is the only feasible way i feel which would work for me, why do i say so? i dun want others to be affected by me and carry the burden with me. i feel it is my responsibility to shoulder it myself. so just leave me alone alright?

P.S.P.S

thks the group for your concern.

thks peck hoon for the honey stick, it made me feel alot better, and you didnt have to say that kai jie bought it.