im tired of coming to school, i've got no motivation to come to school when there's ABSOLUTELY no reason for me to attend school - especially since im off canoe training for a long period.
-sigh-
my class is getting more and more clique-ish. apparently im the one they REMEMBER at the very end or worse still, they forget all about me.
going home is one of the most torturous - they can walk and when they do not see me, what do they do? CONTINUE walking. i seriously mean like HUH? whats with you guys man? you do not see your friend and you keep walking. wtf?
im trying my best not explode because i've a made mistake of doing this in my previous class, thus souring friendships in the class. its not right of me to do so either. but these past events have my tolerance level zoom skyhigh - WAY WAY past my limitations. im on the verge of a violent eruption and i dun think anyone'd like it.
but like what shiqi said which i find very true. the class has fun people but cliques form over time, and those who listen to mandarin songs apparently are clicking together, and i find myself belonging to neither side.
im trying my hardest to maintain the high energy i have but everything i do just doesnt seem good enough.
sad isnt it?
the LAST thing i wanna see is the clique in which i was orginally in, being formed nicely without ME inside of it. you guys dun see do you? that im gradually drifting away.
sympathy is so pathetic, or rather IM the one pathetic, i cant live without friends as i find a neccessity in MY life, but all im getting is crap after crap.
motivation to attend W45M is a big fat fat zero. motivation to actually attend school itself WITHOUT canoe training, needless to say - negative digits.
i dun really care no more.
all i can do is just keep up with the smiles and pretend.
and to the peeps of W45M - i got nothing to do with her. keep up your senseless jokes and i, PERSONALLY promise you guys that you hear or see nothing but the side of me which you guys will definitely abhor.
Labels: get well and chiong for canoe